You've got them wrapped around your finger (Attn: Z'ash)

Teagan stormed into her weyr, head pounding, and cursed luridly when she bashed her knee against a table that hadn't been there for Turns. Lashing out with a snarl, she kicked the table over, barely noticing the papers that fell off it and went scattering across the floor.

"Bloody shards and crackdust," she cursed, stomping to where she'd placed her bags after she'd made sure Ensieth was resting after their trip. The shadow was awake now, eyes swirling orange and red in response to her riders mood.

Teagan froze, forcing herself to calm her mind and reach out to comfort Ensieth. She wouldn't rise tonight, she confirmed with a relieved sigh. "Calm down love," she whispered, trying to wrest some control over her emotions back.

Having succeeded in freeing a nightgown and her own bedding, she tossed the furs onto the bed that 14 Turn old her had made this morning and five Turns ago, then just let her leathers drop wherever they did as she changed. After the disaster of a first meeting she'd just experienced, she didn't care much.

Sighing, she went to right the table she had upended and gather the papers that had fallen. Her fingers lingered on them, having completely forgotten that she had started several notes to Tr'cev and abandoned them there after finally settling on the simple message she had left him.

Her heart in her throat, she put the papers back neatly. She thought that coming back with Z'ash would be easy, that it might feel like home, but she found herself missing where they'd come from more and more.

This is ill advised. You should give her space to find her calm. Eniseth will rise soon. Manticath said sagely as Z'ash dismounted, dropped down onto Eniseth's ledge and letting his body sink into a deep bow to the shadow queen. The bronze crooned to the shadow, lowering his great head.


My Queen, Beauty of Night. My rider would speak to yours. He comes, as humans say, 'hat in hand'. Though he does not wear a hat, so I cannot claim to know what he is talking about.

"Teagan, love. Allow me to speak." he said respectfully.

There was more than enough room for both shadow and bronze on the ledge, and Ensieth scooted to make room for Manticath. This might be a bad idea..., she began.

Teagan had been so withdrawn in her thoughts, she hadn't heard Manticath land on the ledge, but she spun on her heel when she heard Z'ashs voice.

"No," she snarled, advancing on him menacingly. "You have said QUITE enough! Are you out of your mind?" She reached out and grabbed a glass of water left from that morning and hurled it at the bronzerider. "Demanding Eastern Weyr? That was NEVER part of the plan!"

It had been five Turns and that bred habit. So Z'ash ducked just in time to miss the glass, which shattered loudly behind him. He upturned his palms as he had in the past and braved her barrage of angry words. He listened, sinking into the crouch some distance from her. He would not crowd her, he would not speak or barrel over her voice. He waited, watching.

My rider means well. He does not intend or wish to upset yours. Manticath said to Eniseth.

"Why on PERN did you do that?" she demanded, turning away and storming to the other end of the weyr. "Br'son didn't trust us from the moment we landed, and you make outlandish demands that were never part of the plan! Didn't you see how they looked at us?"

She clenched her fists in tight balls so that she wouldn't be more tempted to punch him in his face than she already was. "What have you got to say for yourself?" she finally asked, her breathing ragged and voice small.

Z'ash took a deep breath and marshaled his feelings, thoughts and most importantly, his words. He slowly got to his feet and held out his hands to her, palm up.

"I said it for you. You, who risked dragon and life to jump five Turns forward and who braved all for Pern. I have followed you, live with you, loved, slept with, defended, protected, respected and valued you." he said, slowly taking a step forward. His voice softened still.

"I saw and heard the way they talked to you. Like you were a child and not a courageous young woman who saved the world from utter destruction. You are a marvel, Teagan. You are the Lessa of our time."

He took another step forward and then another. He held his arms out to her, his brown eyes meeting hers. There was love there and censure for himself.

"And if you are Lessa, how can I be any less than F'lar? He dared! He risked! He did all in his power to make sure Benden survived. It's in all the stories, all the chronicles. He RISKED much to honor the woman and world he loved." he said, his tone deepening. He longed to hold her and that fact was evident in every line of his body.

"How could I not risk for you, as he did for her." he ended, his voice ending in a sigh.

Whatever she'd been expecting him to say, that wasn't it. She shook her head, rejecting it all. He had never spoken like this.

"We've seen ten Turns into the future, Z'ash," she said, suddenly feeling horribly tired. "None of that happens, we don't go to Eastern, I don't become Weyrwoman. We came back here, to home, and we stay here. Br'son told us this."

Ignoring his outstretched hands, she passed him and sat on the edge of her bed, putting her head in her hands. "There was a plan, and you didn't follow it," she continued. "And yes they were treating me like a child, but puffing up your chests and making us LOOK like children didn't help at all!"

She kept shaking her head, finally looking up at him. Tears were running down her cheeks. "I didn't ask for any of this! I don't want to be Lessa. And we didn't do this for fame or notoriety, we did it because we're dragonriders, or did you forget that?"

"I rarely forget things," he said, coming to sit near but not right next to her, his legs hanging off the ledge. " but I don't need to tell you that. You've lived with me, you know my strengths and weaknesses as well as Manticath. Not even Ashrah knows me as well. Not even Jah'vi."

He inhaled deeply. "Whether it was part of the plan, which I admit it was not, it doesn't change this fact. White Lighting hosts six queens, three of breeding status. That is an accident waiting to happen, it's in the records. You know I read everything and all my researched points to disaster if we don't start consider spreading out. What about when the others get here. Yllaveth has flown, Eastern still has the young class to bring and Eniseth will fly soon. Aliseth dropped three more queens dragons on our Weyr from one hatching! Eniseth is as queen fertile as her sister, if not more so should Manticath continue to catch her. " he licked his lips.

"I remember the chronicle of the creation of Benden Weyr. Fort was overcrowded and a young queenrider and her following started visiting a few promising sites. Eventually, the Fort Weyrleaders gave them the sight they wanted and that's how Torene became the first Weyrwoman of Benden Weyr. Except in Torene's case, she had Sean and Sorka of Faranth. We, aren't as fortunate." he said frowning.

Z'ash did not have anything against Br'son; his Weyrsenior was typically a sensitive individual that you could talk to. The snappish Br'son was not one Z'ash knew and his eyes narrowed in suspicion as to what Sh'lor might have done to him.

"I cannot believe Sh'lor is Weyrleader, even knowing that we know." he said, shaking his head.

"But we KNOW that none of that happens Z'ash!" she protested, standing up again. She had to put distance between them or she would do what she'd been doing for the past five turns; cling to him because he was familiar.

But right now he didn't seem familiar at all.

"Br'son would have told us if there had been a queen fight. He would have told us what to expect if we were coming back to danger or our deaths." Tears began to fall down her cheeks again, trying to convince herself of that. Because she'd read the records, also, and she knew what he was saying was a possibility. Shards, all queenriders were WELL aware of the dangers. "It's up to the senior queen to decide how many Queens are in her Weyr, not us. Not YOU."

She rubbed her eyes harshly with her knuckles. "Don't change the subject," she all but snapped, rounding on him again. "You didn't follow the plan, and now they don't trust us. Either of us. And I don't think they're wrong after what happened in there."

"Teagan, I won't rule out the possibility that we can affect the timeline, in the negative or positive, now that be are back. What do you think would happen if Manticath and I jumped Between without coordinates RIGHT NOW. Would nothing happen or would all of Manticath's and Eniseth's offspring cease to exist in an eye blink? We don't know. We have changed the equation, with hundreds if not thousands of possible outcomes." his said, his voice going tight. He got to his feet and paced back to Manticath.

"Everyone makes mistakes, Teagan. I may be overstepping my bounds but I will not all the mistakes of others to lessen, belittle or endanger you. Good night, love." he said, motioning to Manticath. The bronze hesitated but rose, offering his arm. Z'ash mounted, stapped himself in and turned to look at her with dark brown eyes.

Her entire body flinched when he mentioned removing himself and Manticath like that, and Ensieth warbled in concern. As mad as she was, just even him saying that made her feel sick to her stomach.

"Br'son would have warned us," she said softly, grasping to that little thread of trust she had in the man who had sent them back here. "Good night, Z'ash."